Many FRIST dates

Many FRIST dates

July 23, 2025

I don’t want to share too many personal details about my relationships, as I prefer to keep those moments private, also since they involve others, too. What I feel more comfortable sharing are my thoughts and reflections, shaped by growth, mindset, and the world around me.

Recently, I've shared some general thoughts about relationships. It marks a time when I've started to focus more intentionally on love. Maybe someday, when I look back, I'll smile or laugh at how I used to think when I was younger --- new to love, new to relationships.

I imagine saving the deeper parts of this journey for later, when I'm in a meaningful, successful relationship. Perhaps when I'm already a wife, a mom. That would be the right moment to share more, when I've found my answers, when insights come with results. For now, I'm collecting little pieces that might someday grow into something bigger. A long story. A novel I hope to write.

Today, I just want to write a little. Something about relationships. Even the word itself feels a bit poetic and that feeling is enough to make me want to write it down.

Many first dates.

Literally, many first dates.

Not in a dreamy, every-time-feels-like-the-first kind of way, but quite simply, just many first dates with entirely new people.

This isn't a post about first-date advice. I'm not writing tips or how-to's. That would turn it into something more technical and what I want is something emotional. And I also want to stay away from revealing too much about my own relationship path through specific opinions or experiences. That part is still unfolding.

First dates --- Maybe that's something many people go through. I did, too. I embraced those experiences. I opened up more, stepped outside my comfort zone, and allowed myself to explore the possibilities whether for friendship or something more. And through it all, I came to understand people and myself a little better. Over time, I've learned to reduce the chance of “first and only” dates.

First dates are important, not because there is a need to impress anyone but because they are exactly what they say: firsts. That alone gives them meaning. They're the beginning of something, or sometimes just a reminder of how we begin again.

But I think the later dates are even more important. They don't always feel as exciting or dramatic as the first, but they matter deeply because that's when decisions are made. That's when you begin to understand whether something casual has the potential to grow into something serious. Later dates are when people begin to unfold more honestly, and when choices quietly form. The first date may open the door, but it's the later ones that show you whether you're meant to stay.

I've been touched by many love stories of others. And maybe, finally, it's time I become the main character in mine.

When I talk about love with friends, one often says I'm more romantic than realistic. She might be right. Some of my views come from movies, songs, and dreamy stories. But they're also rooted in reality and in the hope that love can be both real and beautiful. I've also seen real-life love that feels just as romantic. The kind that looks soft and simple on the outside, but you can feel it deeply when you watch how people treat each other. 

Sometimes, it's in the way love is received. And sometimes, it’s in the ability to turn that love into something romantic through words, through expression, through presence. Maybe my friend sees love through a more practical lens, reflected in her own realistic marriage. And that's okay. But I believe I'll build something different in a way that I want it to become. 

PS. (Not related LOL)

How to Win in Chess

1. Understand how to checkmate.

When the opponent's King is trapped

- Checkmate often requires using two pieces to cover the King's escape squares and deliver the final threat. In this case, the King has no legal moves and cannot escape.

- Sometimes, one piece is enough if the King is already blocked by its own pieces or the edge of the board. There's simply no way out.

2. Take advantage of your opponent's mistakes. If your opponent blunders, seize the opportunity to gain material or a better position

3. Keep your King safe and have an escape plan 

                                                                                                      Hanoi, July 23, 2025